The Four Minutes that Could Save your Marriage


Do you know which are the most important minutes of your marriage? These are the first four minutes after waking up and those four after returning from work.

An inappropriate gesture or remark in the range of these four minutes blows up the atmosphere in your home. Conflicts are ignited much more easily than at any other time of the day.

High voltage zone

What do we usually see at 6 pm if the Dad was at work? The mother took the children out of kindergarten, bought this and that, and on the way home, tries to put things in order and cook something for dinner. Daddy comes home and slams on the couch, ready to rest and a waterfall of reproach is coming in.

Everyone is expecting something

The woman – he should buy the most important things for the next day, to bring the curtains to the local laundry…

Kids – dad should bring ice cream, assemble that new plane and play with us…

And from every reproach “Have you….?” A scandal erupts.

Dad is still a human. (And the mother, too.)

Change of pace

Both parents need some time to “shift speed” to get into a lower gear. They need time to relax.

Make up a welcome ritual.

Let everyone volunteer to prepare for this moment. And no matter who comes home first, the ritual should be respected by everyone who is involved.

Dad sips a cold juice in mom’s glass, mom serves him a beer, the children wash their hands and deal in a gentle way – drawing or telling how they spent their day in kindergarten. The conversation goes smoothly to dinner when everyone gathers around the table.

It may be simple. Try playing a game. At some point, it will become a habit. And it will become part of everyday life. A ritual that can save you a scandal.

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